Navjot Sidhu's one liners

1. That ball went so high it could have got an air hostess down with it.

2. There is light at the end of the tunnel for India, but it's that of an incoming train which will run them over.
3. Experience is like a comb that life gives you when you are bald.
4. This quote was made after Ganguly called Dravid for a run and midway sent him back and Dravid was runout in the third test against the West Indies at Barbados."Ganguly has thrown a drowning man both ends of the rope."
5. Sri Lankan score is running like an Indian taxi meter.
6. Statistics are like miniskirts, they reveal more than what they hide.
7. Wickets are like wives - you never know which way they will turn!
8. He is like Indian three-wheeler which will suck a lot of diesel but cannot go beyond 30!
9. The Indians are going to beat the Kiwis! Let me tell you, my friend, that the Kiwi is the only bird in the whole world which does not have wings!
10. As uncomfortable as a bum on a porcupine.
11. The ball whizzes past like a bumble bee and the Indians are in the sea.
12. The Indians are finding the gaps like a pin in a haystack.
13. The pitch is as dead as a dodo.
14. Deep Dasgupta is as confused as a child is in a topless bar!
15. The way Indian wickets are falling reminds of the cycle stand at Rajendra Talkies in Patiala...one falls and everything else falls!
16. Indian team without Sachin is like giving a Kiss without a Squeeze.
17. You cannot make Omelets without breaking the eggs.
18. Deep Dasgupta is not a Wicket Keeper, he is a goal keeper. He must be given a free transfer to Manchester United.
19. He will fight a rattlesnake and give it the first two bites too.
20. One, who doesn't throw the dice, can never expect to score a six.
21. This was uttered after Eddie Nichols, the third umpire, ruled Shivnarine Chanderpaul 'NOT OUT' in the second test at Port of Spain, T&T. "Eddie Nichols is a man who cannot find his own buttocks with his two hands."
22. Anybody can pilot a ship when the sea is calm.
23. Nobody travels on the road to success without a puncture or two.
24. You got to choose between tightening your belt or losing your pants.
25. The cat with gloves catches no mice.
26. Age has been perfect fire extinguisher for flaming youth.
27. You may have a heart of gold, but so does a hard-boiled egg.
28. He is like a one-legged man in a bum kicking competition.
29. The third umpires should be changed as often as nappies and for the same reason

Some more..........................

Fattest pigs go to the butcher first."

"You don't kill a man who is hell-bent on committing suicide"

'In the orchard of opportunity, you can't wait for the fruit to drop'.

According to Navjot, Sourav Ganguly is "The Burden of Calamity"

"Money is like manure. Its no good unless you spread it!" (Talking about the distribution of money in the Indian cricket team)

"They are so timid, they wouldn't say boo to a goose!" (Talking about the tail of the Indian batting order)

Good intentions die unless utilized

"Statistics are like bikinis… what they reveal is suggestive, what they hide is essential!"

One comment he made that they picked up in the papers over here was regarding a shot Tendulker played off his toes... "he played that like a dwarf at a urinal"...

I lean on statistics like a drunken man leans on a lamppost, only for support, not illumination

When Dravid nicked Bond through the slips for 4 from a full half volley, Sidhu said....... that's Ok from Bond, in order to catch a trout you must be prepared to lose a fly

He has a backlift like an octopus falling out of a tree, all over the place!

There is always free cheese in a mousetrap

Come to my parlour said the spider to the fly

A dog kennel is no place to hide a sausage

You can never unscramble eggs

Call the bear uncle until you are safely across the bridge

"He's wallowing in foolishness like a rhino in an African pool."

Gamblers they Are like Toilets BROKE one Day Flush The Next (Navjot Sidhu Talks About The decision To Bring On Harbhajan Singh Into The attack During The 1st Test In Wellington New Zealand)

The Only Thing You Get In Life Without Trying is dandruff